Pero Slobode

You know that feeling when it’s your turn to say something, and suddenly your throat tightens, your heart starts racing, your legs go weak, and your whole body goes numb and paralyzed? Your voice disappears — it becomes squeaky, shallow, shaky. Your mind goes blank, and your thoughts become so overwhelming that they slip away… like chaotic buzzing bees. You feel like you might faint, throw up, the ground is swaying under your feet, your palms are sweating, your hands are shaking… A whole storm is happening inside you, while on the outside absolutely nothing has changed. The same person or people are standing in front of you, with the same facial expression they had a half-second ago — a half-second that, for you, has lasted an eternity. For them, everything is the same; they have no idea about the inner agony you’re going through, while you feel as if the whole world has just collapsed onto your shoulders. That stage fright and fear of being seen doesn’t only show up when you’re expe...

 They told us and taught us to be obedient and good. I’m not sure anyone ever truly explained what that even means. I have the feeling that we, as children, learning from the examples of the people closest to us — and later, from society as a whole — mostly understood “being good” as doing favors for others at the expense of ourselves, giving endlessly, never asking or receiving, staying quiet and enduring whatever life throws at us. Because that's what we witnessed most often, and what was also expected of us. Many of us learned it under threats of punishment, beatings, restrictions — which planted a seed of self-blame, guilt, and not-enoughness deep within. As if martyrdom and suffering were some form of virtue or gratitude. Because if you complain — you're ungrateful. And if you're ungrateful — then you're “bad.” Something like that… Still, with all my being, I believe that what they actually wanted to say was “Respect others and do good deeds,” but from their own...

Five years after I shyly opened my Instagram page feather_of_freedom , born out of a deep need to express myself to the World and a desire to share my writings, reflections, and observations — I’ve finally decided to launch my blog. That Instagram page hasn’t been active for four years now, but the words are still there. They testify to a moment in time . As I read the first public pieces written by that young woman, I remember exactly where they were written, when, who was there, and who was missing. I feel her pain, and I send her immense love and a long, warm embrace filled with support and strength — because I know how she feels, I know what she needs, and even more, I know how much she truly deserves all of it. So much courage can be read between her lines — so much hope, enthusiasm, and persistence. A lion-strong heart beating loud and clear inside her soft chest. Every heartbeat a step forward — a triumph of divine love and the Spark she carries within. The Spark guiding her....